When it doubt, seek 8-Ball wisdom

I sat staring at the computer screen, my finger resting lightly on the mouse. The price was hefty. The risk, heftier. One click and I'd be committed to this adventure.

Panic struck.

Really? Do I invest in this crazy course — the STCW95 — a costly certificate I'll probably never use again? Do I drop everything, face five months without my beloved dog, enter the unknown? Do I do it? Do I take the leap?! I was desperate for counsel.

So I asked the Magic Eight Ball.

After a brief "Hmmmmmmm...", it said:

"It is decidedly so."

So I filled out the form. I typed in my credit card numbers. I was ready… but needed one last assurance.

I asked the Magic Eight Ball again. This time it read:

"It is certain."

Wait wait wait — What if it always answers in the affirmative? I needed proof! I asked it: "Should I stay here, continuing doing what I'm doing?" It said:

"My sources say no."

And I booked the class.